MAP Episode 58: Get Your Crush On

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The Beautiful Girls of GameCrush

Download Link: Produced 2010.03.28

Eric Jordan makes a long overdue return just in time to cover the final week of the Final Fantasy XIII feature. Then, following a discussion of gaming wank firm GameCrush, Nate Liles falls suspiciously silent. Ginia and Lusi suspect the worse–and rejoice!


  1. -Perhaps my opinion of the FFXIII battlesystem was over-inflated due to the abject awfulness of the rest of the game …

    -XIII has generally good VA, but the VA direction is way off.

    -Ginia you should stop being so mean to NATE.

    -This class action is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard, these people should have their heads nailed to their feet!

    -I think Midgar would be better as a completely uninteractive linear grinding tube!

    -Enough people own a Zune to have a marketplace?!

  2. -Ginia, keep being mean to Nate.

    -I got a yuffie shaped shrine myself.

    -wow, that really was a horrible Jew joke. I need to use that sometime.

    -… that’s some RPG there.

  3. @SN: I want to see a person with his head nailed to his feet. Also, your anti-FFVII mentality is BAD NEWS.

    @breaka666: A Yuffie shrine!? Bizarre!

    @Ginia: Don’t be mean to Nate or ANYONE.

  4. Really this remake shit would not be happening if SE hadnt released their Stupid FFVII tech demo

  5. Totally untrue, as the remake crowd was begging for an FFVII remake long before that tech demo was ever conceived of, let alone released.

    People have been wanting an FFVII remake almost since the release of FFVIII, when better cutscenes and higher-quality polygons began to be the standard.

    I suspect we’ll actually get an FFVII remake now. It’s just a matter of time–and given SE’s recent spurt of attention, I suspect it will be sooner rather than later. More power to them. I’d love to play FFVII with updated graphics and sound–as long as they leave the story and battle system alone.

  6. And what if they completely balls it up? Do you trust SE to not thoroughly ruin it?

  7. The reality is very simple: currently, we have no remake whatsoever. All we have is the original. If the remake is terrible and not worth playing, so be it–I am no worse off than I am now. But, if it is excellent, then I am up one excellent game.

    You can’t lose what you never had.

  8. … Or you wind up buying the inferior version of a game you already own …

  9. Considering I just spent $60 on an FF with nothing behind it but the name, I think I’m willing to take that risk.

    Are you seriously maintaining that you don’t want an FFVII remake at all, for anyone, because you’re afraid it might not be good, and that you might not know this in advance, and that consequently you might be out $60? Because if so, I have to say that is an extremely crabbed mentality which would, if truly held, preclude the possibility of all game development.

  10. If it is made I will buy it the first day it goes on sale. The moment I start it up I will begin noticing all the things they did wrong, the corners they cut, and all the ways that they’ve made the characters even more emo to appease all their retarded fanbase. By the second day I’ll be appalled that all the dungeons are now straight lines, and that all the houses that you could enter in the original are now just static facades. By the third day I will likely have stopped playing, my experience of FFVII permanantly soured. I know this, and still I will buy it.

  11. – It’s good to have Eric back!

    – there aree some really desperate people online. At least now people are making money off putting up with them!

    – personally, I’d be fine with Persona 5 staying on the PS2. It would keep development time and costs down and I could play it in my room if the main tv’s in use.

    – I wonder if “project wombat” from Mass Effect 3 has anything to do with Wombat from CAG’s campaign to get a playable Volus in the next game!

    – Aeris shrine FTW!

    – I can honestly say I’ve never heard the word “kike” before., expanding my vocabulary!

    – I want a sims expansion where I can make my sim a girl.

  12. Also, @SN: Even if a FFVII remake turns out to be nothing but a 7 hour high-def video of Toriyama dropping a duce, there’s nothing about the remake that will make you unable to play the original. If you really want to prevent this grim future from happening, I’ll volunteer to fly out and lock you in a closet so you can’t purchase the game! After all, that’s what friends are for!

  13. I pray everyday that Tetsuya Nomura will leave SE and join Mistwalker. Just so I can final, completely, and utterly ignore all SE related news.

  14. My concern with Square Enix doing a remake is that they would be devoting manpower to rehash an already existing game instead of making something new. Especially since (and I know I’ll be in the minority here) I didn’t really enjoy VII in the first place. So, if they do it again, that’s just going to be a couple years of man-hours that (to me) they’ve wasted when they could be doing something new and innovative with the series. I do accept the fact that they will make tons of money from the rabid fans of the series if they do it, just not from me. I’ve really never understood the fascination with VII besides the fact that it was the first one on the PS1; so that it didn’t have sprite-based graphics anymore. I’ve tried so many times to play through that game, but it just isn’t enjoyable for me. And I’m someone who could even struggle through and finish a game like Cross Edge.

    Also, I would love to see what the Persona 5 people can do with the PS3. The music and gameplay have been great, and if they try to push the PS3 graphically as well, it could be one of the best RPGs ever. That being said, they will mostly be going for the Japanese market; so, I really wouldn’t be surprised if it were a portable release.

  15. @Dan – I’m with you, I didn’t like VII much either. from what I’ve seen it seems that the reason so many people like is because they played it when they were younger and their standards were lower. when one is young even a crappy game can seem awesome and VII was no where near crap so it must have seemed to them like like something out of the Lost Ark. also, it is much easier for a younger person to relate to characters since they haven’t had years of stories and people they hate making them cynical yet. Had I played VII before Tactics I would have probably loved but I didn’t and so my idea of what a good story is had already begun to set and VII didn’t fall inside that definition. another thing, when one is young and plays a game that they really like it colors their expectations for every game after that. to this day I can’t find joy in playing SRPGs because Tactics has spoiled me. “are you as good as Tactics? no? then you’re not a good game!” It irritates me that people won’t shut up about a VII remake but to be honest if SE kept dropping rumors about a full HD version of FFT on the PS3 (instead of that bullshit remake for the PSP…) I’d be squealing like a little fangirl too. I’m sure you’ve got your own VII or Tactics.

    oh yeah, and it was pretty. whenever VII fanboys talk about why they liked VII graphics invariably come up.

    -I hope they combine elements from P3 and P4 for P5. there’s no denying that P4 had better pacing but I still liked P3 better. being able to send your party members out to search the area, being to go all solid snake on the enemies, the tension from knowing that Death himself could spring around the corner at any minute. hopefully there were enough other Persona fans like me making themselves vocal that Atlus would consider doing that rather than simplifying the dungeon crawling further.

  16. @breaka – Yeah, Tactics was awesome, but it had the opposite effect on me. It was my gateway drug into the genre, and they’re my favorite type of game to play now.

    What would I kill for an HD remake of? Final Fantasy VI. I would sell a kidney for that game.

    I’ve had a hard time deciding which I enjoyed more overall: P3 or P4. I really enjoyed both of them a lot. I definitely missed worrying about Death popping up in the dungeon, they need to bring a mechanic like that back.

  17. @Oyashiro: Amen to that, Nomura leaves and Yoichi Wada’s house of cards comes crashing down.

    @Breaka: There’s no secret behind why people love VII so much, it’s just an all around impressive game where graphics, music, design and narrative combine to deliver an experience on a spectacular scale in one of the series most fully realised settings.

    As for the fanboyism, I expect it has something to do with the Japanese cyber/steampunk visuals and cool weapon/clothing designs. FFVII easily has the most distinct visual design, which begs for cos-play. Personally though, I’d be happy to see it put to rest as a franchise …

  18. I can’t wait to see more news on Persona 5! Atlus is the new Square. I just like companies that, you know… respect there fans.

  19. FFVII is still to this day my favorite Final Fantasy. 2nd place is a tie between VI and Tactics.

    Oh why did we never get a true sequel to Tactics? Fuck Tactics Advance!

  20. FFXII is your sequal to FFT. Now that team Ivaluce is no more, that is it. :(

    I’ve been playing FF since the NES and I’m happy to say that my love of FF7 is not because it was the first RPG I played. Our site-wide playthrough last year examined many of the reasons it us do highly regarded, so Dismissing appreciation of it as mere ‘first love’ is wilfully misleading if not outright dishonest.

    Aside: I want to patch my FFT disc up to the new translation from the PSP version. Alack! On the plus side, no battle slowdowns. Soooooo much better!

  21. I’m genuinely surprised that there isn’t a fan hack project to do just that …

  22. VII too was not my first RPG or FF. But I fell in love with it all the same.

    There are some fan hacks that you can get like Vincent and characters like that.

  23. I don’t think there’s a bigger BS stereotype/myth in all of gaming than: Everyone started playing RPGs with VII, everyone only likes VII because it was their first.

    If that was all there was to it then why am I not similarly infatuated with my first platformer, or my first beat’em up, or my first brawler, or my first FPS etc?

  24. My first girlfriend will always have a special place in my heart… She was hot and she put out like crazy. <3

  25. I played some pretty shitty RPGs long before I ever touched VII …

  26. My first ‘rpg’ of any sort was Adventure for the Atari 2600. Now there’s a game that needs a remake!

  27. I said “played it when they were younger” not it was their first, shit. but I see ya’lls point.

  28. @DanChiSao. 100% agree with you. i dont want SE waisting money and resources on a game that i already finished like 6 times like 10 years ago. i want something new.

  29. …Except that SE is capable of working on (many) more than one project at a time, so that logic of ‘don’t make FF7 because I would rather have you make something new!’ doesn’t hold up either. It’s not as if remaking FFVII is going to prevent them developing anything else new at the same time.

    Moreover, is their new stuff good anyway?: Last Remnant, Infinite Undiscovery, FFCC Echoes of Time — does the upcoming stuff look exciting?: Nier, anyone?

    Even if it came to a crisis of resources (which is not the case) I’d rather have them cancel Nier and Agito XIII and give me an FF7 remake. At least it has a solid foundation–and that’s more than can be said for most of the bilge they produce.

  30. @Lusi – I’m not sure if that’s true. if they were to make a VII remake they would probably need Nomura to do it. he’s currently working on Versus and then after that he’s going to have to start on the three new Kingdom Hearts games, one of which will be KH3 (he stated there were three in the works in the KH BBS ultamania). working on one console game and a couple handhelds is one thing but working on KH3 and VII final mix ++ would be a bit extreme. you also got to think about who makes money off of KH. both SE and Disney. even if Nomura did work on KH3 and VII at the same time that would cause KH to get delayed which, I would imagine, would probably rub Disney the wrong way. they also have Fabula Nova Crystalis to think about. that is a huge project for them which they want to keep going for a decade, maybe more and another title in the FF VII compilation would syphon money from that.

    it’s that they don’t want money, it’s that they have to decide between VII (which would make them a bazillion dollars(rough estimate)), KH (which would also make them a bazillion dollars), and XIII (which has been proven to be able to make them a bazillion dollars). SE isn’t as rich as people like to think they are. just recently they had to fire their entire music department (including the dude who worked on XIII). they make a lot, yes, but they spend nearly as much. developing the crystal tools in particular set them back.

  31. @breaka666: Let’s be clear since we reported on this: SE didn’t have to fire their Music department–they switched to the hiring style that everyone else is using of contracting people to perform soundtracks, since it doesn’t make sense economically to spend corporate funds to teach people the business, only to have them leave the moment they are good enough to use consistently.

    This is why N. Uematsu is doing the music for FFXIV (his first full FF Soundtrack since IX) — he is a by-contract composer now, as are most of the big names in that area: Mitsuda, Iwata, &c.

    Nomura’s work on any remake would be limited. FF7 is not a ‘new production’ in the sense that KH3 is, and any remake of it would entail vastly less design work than even a new handheld game. The main issues would be technical, as the system, scenario, and script are already taken care of. Yes, it would be a new console game, but you dramatically overstate the amount of involvement which Nomura would have, provided he would even be involved. It seems far more likely, much to the chagrin myself amongst others, that the project would be given to Motomu Toriyama.

    The fact of the matter is that SE has a lot of people and is capable of handling many games at once. They just finished one main series FF title. They can just as easily replace it with a main series FF title remake without compromising any of their current projects, provided they don’t bump FF7+ up to the top of their priority list, but instead maintain it right where it is added in their development schedule.

    You’re welcome to pretend that SE will have to shut down all of their other operations in order to make one new game that you might not personally like, but I don’t see what anyone can get out of making statements so obviously contrary to reality. If there is a victory to be gained, it isn’t against reason or common sense. I’m not pitching a fit because SE is making Nier, despite the fact that I have no intention of purchasing it–neither am I shouting and moaning about three more KH games: a series I have never enjoyed and which inspires only loathing when it is mentioned. I am perfectly aware that SE has more than one burner on its stove, and they can make KH games and still have the time and resources to make the occasional FF game as well.

    Believe it or not, the reverse is also true.

  32. I’m not saying they would have to shut things down, I’m saying they would be spreading themselves out. if it’s really that simple for them to make a remake why have they not done it? if it turns out that they where actually doing a remake behind peoples backs for a while then I’ll eat my words but I can’t look at a company who’s inner workings I don’t completely understand and assume that the reason they do or don’t do certain things is because they’re incompetent. it just feels like there’s some piece of information that we’re all missing.

  33. SE is capable of working on (many) more than one CRAPPY/SHYTTY project at a time.Thats true for example handhelds games, remakes and spin offs,etc. but a ff7? thats a AAA game, thats anotehr story. we need to move on people, this nostalgia thing its killing jrpgs fast.

  34. @Breaka: The original line — and the one I tend to believe — is that the people they have always WANTED to do it (i.e. members of the original team) are no longer with the company, and they had wanted to contract them, but with no luck.

    I think they really should stick with that plan, but promise the people involved the same share they would have had back when they worked at SE. I suspect, as is usually the case with unfathomable business decision, that money is actually what’s behind the whole thing. It usually turns out to be the case.

    As for that FFXIV video (which is awesome), it’s obvious what they are saying. Listen closely.

    “Where is Caspius?”
    “I don’t know. I was sure he would be here.”
    “Perhaps he is over here?”
    “No, maybe not.”
    “Wait, is that him, over there?”
    “No, that is a majestic vista.”
    “It would be more majestic with Caspius here to tell us how majestic it is.”
    “Perhaps he is inside of this building?”
    “No, he is not inside of this building.”
    “I wonder where Caspius could be.”
    “It is not like him to miss this.”
    “I suspect there is a good reason for it.”
    “Yes, perhaps he does not like Elvaan cooking.”
    “Who can blame him? They eat blue peas.”
    “Caspius loves peas.”
    “I thought he said that he didn’t like blue peas. I thought he said they were responsible for any number of man’s innumerable, unbearable ills, and represented a threat to the survival of the species far more deadly than climate change and U2 concerts combined.”
    “Yeah, I know.”
    “So, he probably doesn’t like Elvaan cooking then.”
    “Hey, is that him over there?”
    “No, it’s just a bunch of japs. I wish Caspius were here.”

  35. By my reckoning SE have three current gen production teams which could handle a FFVII remake (assuming they handle it inhouse. Team Nomura, team Kitase/Toriyama and Kawazu’s Last Remnant team. Of those teams, team Nomura is ruled out owing to commitments, we would all hope that team Kawazu doesn’t handle it (though there’s no downplaying SE’s ability for poor decision making), and finally team Kitase is without an announced project following the release of FFXIII.

    So if they decide to do a FFVII remake, team Kitase will likely put their plans for a mediocre FFXV on hold in order to pursue this project … but who knows … SE might just farm it out … or give it to team Tomb Raider …

  36. I imagined the Eidos logo on a FF VII case and I coughed up blood a little bit. Ima go lie down.

  37. @Breaka: Sadly, I’m one of those “FFVII was my first RPG” crowd and I played the PC port, so I actually associate the Eidos logo pretty heavily with FFVII. Just thought I’d share :D

    About the FFVII remake, as I’ve said before, I’d be all in favor of the idea, but at this point I’ve more or less stopped caring about the rumor mongering going on around it. Unless there’s an E3 announcement like “Surprise, it’s been developed in secret and it’s on store shelves now,” I figure there’ll still be plenty of time to get worked up about it after we know for sure it’s being made. For now, there’s absolutely no shortage of quality games out, so if they start development on an FFVII remake after VSXIII, Agito, Nier, KH3, KH3DS, KH3PSP, etc. and it’s not out until 2018, I’ll pick it up then. In the mean time, real games are out now that I can play (although, honestly, I’d probably prefer a FFVII remake to any game on that list besides KH3 and VSXIII, but that’s just a personal preference).

  38. I’m more interested in BbS than a KH3 that hasn’t even entered into a meaningful stage of production. I cannot understand why people require a number after a game title in order to be excited, when a game with the length and polish of KH2 is set to be released in a few months …

  39. I just don’t like Roxas… I want Sora back… And I want to fight Sephiroth for a third time. :(

  40. Well BbS doesn’t have either character (in playable form), so who knows how good, or not, its three brand new protagonists will be.

  41. @oyashiro – getting confusing? ever since KH2 I’ve been convinced that at least half the writers drop acid.

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